Apparently I don't exist to my family that I reside with today. You'd think the person who gave birth to me on this day would remember my birthday. My own mother and my own child forgot about it completely. How is that for making someone feel like they seriously don't exist?! Even my own extended family and my friends remembered that I was born. My extended family rarely remember it so to have them all remember it was odd too. I am depressed that my immediate family didn't remember it at all. My mom says to my son that they need to make it up to me. Uh um I wasn't born on a later date I was born today. Too late to say happy birthday later on. Since my family couldn't do the job my friends and I are going outside, get a fire going, and celebrate. Yeah I'm a tad pissed off too!

Not looking forward to tomorrow at all. Tomorrow will be my thirty-first birthday. I dread turning 31 especially since my life has been even more suck ass when I turned thirty! It all goes downhill from here ladies and gents. I feel like I am turning 81 instead so can we please fast forward and just skip tomorrow all together? I know I'd really appreciate that. The sucky part of it? I still live at home with mama. Can't change it unfortunately but if I could so would have when I turned 21. However, it's a decade later and I'm still on that same ass boat that paddles in circles in the huge mother fucking ocean. The only life preserver I have from here is the m word. Marriage. However, that ain't gonna happen seeing as I am not in a relationship and refuse to be in one since all I attract is assholes. That would make for an unhealthy marriage. Along with my self-esteem/abuse issues that spells utter disaster. So yeah I really want a fast forward button.

I am still sleepy so I am off to bed now that everyone is gone. I have PT today so I want as much rest as I can have before he wears my muscles out and kills my knee even more. Toodles!